Rolled Monk

Pornography – An Art?

In Kozhikode!, Peeterru! on March 4, 2011 at 11:22 pm

Hello random reader,

Pornography is an art.

In most of the porn which I have seen, the thing that is more fucked than the people acting in it is the concept of sex itself. It is violated, defiled and raped. The process of intercourse is made monotonous and it’s almost as if there is an unwritten set of rules about how to make a porno. Especially American porn like Naughty America, BangBros and all the other nonsense out there.

It usually starts with the male or female actor completely pissed for some reason or the other and the partner doing certain things to relieve them of the stress and calm them down. It is almost like a joke. There is an opening, and then the narrative (which here is the sex) and finally the punch-line during the climax.

For instance, the dude maybe a drug-dealer who is busted by a lady cop during one of her raids. The attire of the cop and her attitude would have “whore” written in capitals all over her. The opening is the most hilarious part in any porn flick and sadly most people don’t watch it.

Drug Dealer Dude (in a husky hunk voice): Well I’ve been caught. I’m going to get into a lot of trouble aren’t I?

(It doesn’t take an Einstein to figure that out dick-face. Stop stating the obvious).

Slut Cop (in a horny, sex depraved voice): You sure got that right. You’ve been a bad, bad boy.

(She almost fucking moans here.  Also, this like ASCII, is the American Standard for a Cunt Initiating Intercourse. This line could be used in any scenario. A student doing detention to improve grades. A secretary about to be fired. A person caught taking a bribe or somebody trying to escape punishment. You can replace the boy with a girl and you’d have the scenario for a bad,bad girl.)

DDD: I am in a dark place in my life right now. I need one chance to change things. Please..

SC: I don’t know. Narco is a major offense you know. And the amount you have here is not just possession. It’s intent to distribute..There sure seems to be a lot of paperwork.

(So the guy basically throws some sentimental shit and generally concludes by saying he wants to change. The lady buys it and starts explaining to him the gravity of the situation and how much trouble she’d be in if she were to set him free.

These movies are inspiring in a way you know. They make us believe that no shit is too deep if you have the right lines and a huge cock. I might even enjoy it if it came up in like 2 of every 10 videos I see. Unfortunately, these kinds of things happen in 9 out of 10 movies in the American porniverse.)

DDD: Is there any way I could make it up to you. Please..

SC: Hmm..I am not sure about this…(at this point she stops whatever she was doing before (which generally involves walking around the guy, bending down and putting her ass on display ) and begins toying with him.)

DDD: Hmm…so that’s how you want it…

And there. They start doing it. There is absolutely no idea where that came from right? I mean, for a few moments there I really thought the poor guy was a lost cause. He somehow managed to save himself.

Bullshit! That’s what all this is. The sex? I don’t even want to talk about it. And after they do it, there’s the punchline.

DDD: From today, I am officially a new man..sigh…

SC: You better be… (and the credits roll)

This is the reason I always feel that insipid pornography is going to be the end of the world. So next time any of you guys watch a porn movie, do not skip the opening. Listen to the dialogues. They are most probably the one thing worth taking away from it.

One of the more serious and scarier things to ponder over is that this is the sex-education most of the people these days have. Especially in urban areas. Looking at the state of things as they are, I’d prefer ignorance any day!  In fact, in Indian villages, I don’t think many men have seen even their wives completely naked. It is funny imagining how the sex is initiated there. Especially in single room houses with 2 or 3 kids already present. But there sure will be some passion there…

This post might not be suitable for everybody. tRead with caution. What? You already read it and are disgusted? Then go listen to some Beiber or see Twilight to cheer yourself up..

So till I write again…ciao ciao.


  1. lol@ last line!!!!

  2. Damn abhinav you just ruined porn for me..But lol@the last line!! 😀

  3. like the disclaimer at the end.. very wise to put it there… ;)…. But i actually think porn is an art form, it brings out so many acting techniques that are conviniently omitted from the main stream movie making, because they are just plain bad. i really think porn it the avant garde of today…, could be better though… like tinto brass, he is god.

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